Tag Archives: etiquette
Great Debate: Phones in the potty?

Great Debate: Phones in the potty?

The other day I was in the restroom at a restaurant and heard the woman in the next stall talking.

And not to me.

She was, I figured out, talking on her cell phone.

It was such a strange experience — even for me as an innocent participant in this. I mean, I didn’t want to flush for fear of “outing” this woman, who was casually chatting on her iPhone like she was lounging in her living room.

I’ll admit: I’ve walked into the bathroom still on the phone. But I wouldn’t go into full restroom action with someone on the other end listening. That’s just rude — and gross.

But why? We don’t seem to mind people talking in restrooms. Why is it different if that conversation is taking place on a mobile device?

Probably because we suspect the person on the other end doesn’t know where the caller is — or what those strange sounds are. And we feel awkward, not just for us, but for that unsuspecting person on the line.

The bathroom should be a private space — even if it’s a public restroom. I’m not going to subject others to my bathroom antics — and neither should you.

What do you think?

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#TodaysGift

Dog Kimono from Inu Inu Hawaii

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Days left: 3

Dog kimono or yukata from Inu Inu Hawaii (www.inuinuhawaii.com)

Price: $30 online or at pet boutiques such as Calvin & Susie in Kilohana Square

The gist: Bored of the usual dog outfits? Or your pooch is quite the fashion diva? Get a kimono (or yukata) from Honolulu-based Inu Inu Hawaii, which specializes in unique Asian-inspired apparel for dogs. They come in all sizes — in fact, you can custom order ones for larger breeds — and patterns. Imagine your Rottweiler in one of these!

Best for: Dog owners, of course!

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No more 'your way'

No more 'your way'

Remember that Burger King promise, “Have it your way”?

Well, turns out restaurants and diners around the country are opting for exactly the opposite, taking control of their menus and dining experiences and telling the customer to just shut up and take it, according to a recent article in the New York Times.

They’re not offering substitutions. They’re not creating special-order dishes. They’re not even serving ketchup.

You can’t get a toasted bagel at one bagel shop in Greenwich Village. There’s only one kind of cheese at a gastropub in the West Village. And forget trying to get decaf coffee at one Chicago restaurant.

This isn’t anything new at Japanese restaurants, where you can’t even swap out the entrees in a combination teishoku. (Don’t believe me? Try it one day!)

While I can see the allure in having the power to order whatever I want from any restaurant — just how I like it — I can empathize with owners and chefs who are constantly manipulating their dishes to each customer’s tastes, as unrefined as they may be.

It goes back to this idea of customization, ownership and entitlement — to me, anyway. We have this notion that we can — and should — have whatever we want, as long as we’re willing to pay for it. And I don’t know if that’s always the best decision. We diagnosis our own illness, thanks to WebMD. We shape our world opinions based on blogs and Twitter. And now we think we know more than the chefs who spent years honing their skills. No, no, the steak tartar should be seared, trust me, I know. Oh, and served with ketchup, please.

So what do you think about this latest trend? You think customers are always right — or do you think we’ve become too demanding?

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ASK DR. DISH: Big family, no money

ASK DR. DISH: Big family, no money

Question: I know you’re not married, but I figured maybe your readers could help. I am engaged to a guy who has a very large family. I have a big family, too. We also have a lot of friends, coworkers and clients. Our guest list right now is somewhere between 700 and 800 people. There is NO WAY we can afford a big wedding with that many guests! We will be BROKE! I have a friend who went to Italy to get married and only invited 12 people. Is that OK? Do people get upset if they don’t get invited to a wedding? We don’t want people to be mad at us. HELP!

Answer: Honestly, I don’t see anything wrong with a destination wedding, especially if you want to keep the guest list short. I mean, at the end of the day, it’s your wedding — and unless they’re footing the bill, no one should have a say in your plans.

I have a friend like yours who went to Italy to get married. Only a handful of people attended — I didn’t; I couldn’t get away from work — and she was able to keep it intimate. It was like a wedding and honeymoon in one!

That said, it’s hard to avoid hurting people’s feelings when it comes to weddings. I know people who are upset about not getting invited to weddings — especially when they find out other people in the group were invited — and those feelings aren’t easy to fix. You have to just be honest and transparent with everyone, explain your situation and only invite the people who really matter. It’s hard, I can imagine, but it’s your wedding.

I actually don’t know if the advice I’m giving you is right. Anyone else out there can help? Maybe someone with experience?

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Cat Chat episode 12: Be my guest

Cat Chat episode 12: Be my guest

Oh, admit it.

You’ve forgotten to RSVP to a wedding. You’ve written a check to the bride and groom because you forgot to go to the bank on Friday. And you’ve worn black to the hotel reception.

(OK, I did.)

But are these things truly faux pax in the world of weddings and formal events?

Well, I sit down with Sandra Williams, owner and event designer of Finishing Touch Hawaii, to learn more about proper guest etiquette to formal events.

And let me tell you, I need the advice!

Got a suggestion for someone I should interview? Got an idea for a topic I should tackle? Post ‘em here. We love hearing from you!

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To read all of Cat’s blogs, visit www.nonstophonolulu.com/thedailydish. Follow Cat on Twitter @thedailydish or send her an e-mail at cat@nonstophonolulu.com.

Subscribe to Nonstop Honolulu on YouTube »

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ASK DR. DISH: Regifting is great!

ASK DR. DISH: Regifting is great!

Question: I am sure you get this question ALL THE TIME about regifting. But I still do not know if it’s okay to do it. I do it all the time and my friends give me grief about it. What’s so bad about giving away a gift you don’t need???? What is someone else out there can actually use a Ninja (food processor)???? Why is regifting so bad?????

Answer: I don’t think there’s a person who’s reading this that either 1) has regifted something or 2) been the recipient of a regift, whether you knew it or not. Oh, yeah, it’s that prevalent!

Even I’ll admit I’ve given away a gift that I’ve received — and found no use for — but I don’t disguise them as gifts. I literally just give them away. I’m like you, if there’s someone else out there who can make better use of something I have, by all means have it. There’s no point in me having an iron, for example, when I don’t use one. (Hint to Mom.)

But still, no one likes to talk about regifting, at least in public. We may do it in the privacy our own homes, in total secrecy, not even revealing what we’ve done to our spouses or best friends — some of whom might be recipients, as a matter of fact — and so the discussion doesn’t get very far.

So if you’re going to do it, do it right. Here’s some advice:

  • Don’t mention it. Meaning, don’t tell the person you’re giving them something you don’t want — from someone else. Better to keep that to yourself.
  • Don’t give only a part of the gift. Like, don’t give a gift card after you’ve used some of it. Or don’t break apart a set and give a portion away. That’s just tacky.
  • Don’t regift something old. You shouldn’t be “gifting” used items or hand-me-downs. It should be an actual gift, something you received recently. Not something you got in 1986 that you finally decided to give away.
  • Don’t use the same wrapping — and card. Seriously. If you’re not going to spring for an actual gift, you may as well pony up the cash for new wrapping paper and a card.
  • Don’t give the gift back to the person who gave it to you. (That’s pretty obvious.)

Anyone got a regifting story to tell? Anyone willing to admit they do it? Let’s hear it!

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CAT’S GIFT IDEAS

SHOPPING DAYS LEFT: 4

TODAY’S GIFT IDEA: Laka Signature Massage from Laka Skin Care & Spa on Ward Avenue

Got a gift idea? Send ‘em my way at cat@nonstophonolulu.com.

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To read all of Cat’s blogs, visit www.nonstophonolulu.com/thedailydish. Follow Cat on Twitter @thedailydish or send her an e-mail at cat@nonstophonolulu.com.

Subscribe to Nonstop Honolulu on YouTube »

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